Bitter before Better

Do you ever have just endless days of being on edge and wanting to argue every little point? That's where I was a few weekends ago, much to Josh's dismay.

Bitter about everything and finding myself jealous of others life events or smaller successes-- Bitter that friends and family are achieving goals they've set for themselves when I've dreamed of the same things. Bitter that our apartment never feels 100% clean for longer than an evening. Bitter that my life isn't the picture perfect fairytale I dreamt it would be as a child.

I used to feel bad about feeling this way... truly bad. I should be more appreciative of what I have, I have more than others and I've never felt like I couldn't ask for help.

But then I realized... I'm human. I'm allowed to have these moments. These moments make me more real. They allow me to connect with more people and have a larger understanding of what I really want out of this path I'm on. Life isn't perfect, no matter how we paint it to be on the outside or on social media. Sometimes like sucks and we have to trudge forward until the load on our shoulders lightens.

Sometimes I take my bitter feelings out on other people, placing them as the blame for my issues. Reality is that I've made my life to be the way that it is, as perfectly imperfect as it is. I have the ability to change both my life and my mindset. Being bitter is okay, as long as I'm able to determine why I feel the way I do and am able to take that and learn to be better moving forward.

Long story short, being bitter (on occasion) can lead to you being better. Don't allow the bitter to fill your mind and you'll find yourself doing better. But also don't get down about being bitter... you'll get better.